Life Lessons

Final day today!

I will post about the rugby match and fundraising performance when we get back as we are leaving early tomorrow morning.

Yesterday, we continued with dance and rugby in the morning and then had a meeting with the staff to summarise what we have acheived since being here. We have ticked off everything on the to-do list and more, so I am very happy with what we have done and the staff are eternally grateful to us and to you for all our support.

We sat in a circle in the Boys Home in the evening, with the aim of counselling the boys. Redondo expressed how much the boys need guidance and words of wisdom from me but I found the idea of little me, giving 25 boys something they could hold on to, very daunting! I just prayed that I would have the right words at the right time and even when the meeting began I didn't know where to start! I decided to start with my testimony as I know from experience that testimonies always breaks down any barriers and I wanted to show my human side to the children. I explained how I am struggling for money myself in England and that I owe the bank a lot of money as I have been a student for many years and have been looking for a teaching job for a whole year now. I explained how I felt the need to come to Uganda to help the boys but had no way of getting there without money. I went on to explain that God had everything in control as he introduced us to Rich the Pilot who sorted us out with discounted flights, enabling me to fly to Uganda but with no money to spend. I explained how amazing the church have been in helping with donations of money and clothes for the boys and how Matt's family really helped in holding a party at their home, where we could talk to their neighbours about Mydel. I had a flight booked but no money to spend until a week before we flew out! I used my experience to teach them to trust in God and to be patient on his timing.

From there, topics of discussion popped in to my head and the counseling just flowed. I highlighted the slum cycle of poverty, substance abuse and pregnancy starting the cycle again. They smiled as they understood what I was saying even more than I did! I tried to encourage them to stop the slum cycle for themselves, saying that now they are living in The Mydel Boys Home, the slum cycle can stop and its up to them to take responsibility of their own future and make positive changes happen. I told them to focus on their future and think like they are already a husband, or father, or grandfather. They need to adopt the mindset that they need to ensure everything they are doing is to better their future, so that they can provide for themselves and their families in times to come. This led on to talking about realistic goals. For most of them, their only dream is to become a Professional Footballer. I explained that they may not all make it as a footballer and they need to think realistically, with another option of work. I encouraged them to home in on the subjects they are strong at and to focus on these subjects, seeing them through to University. I told them that they no longer have to consider a life of a street drinker or a thief to gain money but instead they can imagine themselves in professional jobs which can pay them a good salary.

This led on to encouraging them to acknowledge the skills they already have. I congratulated them on choosing a life far from the street life they were living and for making such a huge change in their characters, behaviour and attitude, since I first met them. I highlighted how much they have learnt - how to be brothers, how to cooks, how to clean, how to study, how to bake cakes, how to farm. I told them to make the most of these skills and invest it in their lives so that they begin to learn how to look after themselves and become less reliant on Redondo and myself.

I then talked about them taking responsibility of their own health and well-being. I have noticed that far too many boys are complaining of headaches and fever and told them that I was concerned about the amount of water they were drinking. They get up at 6am and train for football for a few hours, walk back to the home and then tidy the home, have school or whatever in the morning and don't sit down til 3pm to eat, during which they still dont drink! I have told them that I will be expecting them to drink much more in the future so they are buying another Jeri can to carry water and I will include money for water purifying tablets every 3months, when we send out money for food.

Moving on from health, I felt it was important to discuss girls with them! When I said this they all perked up and got all giggly! I told them that I understand that they are at the age where girls have become interesting but they must choose their girl wisely! I talked to them about characters of people and how they must observe the girls character before committing to anything with them. I told them that I expect them to only have 1 wife (as in Uganda, many men have more than 1 wife at one time!) and that they need to view this woman as the one they will spend their whole life with. I also talked to them about sex, HIV and pregnancy. I told them I do not want any babies born in the home and they laughed in agreement. They were all so grateful for the advice and told me that no-one has ever told them this before so they were very pleased that I had been so honest with them as its very relevant to their lives at the moment.

Walking back, the boys came up to me individually and expressed their thanks, saying that no-one in the slums ever cares enough to give their time to sit down and discuss such valuable lessons and they reasoned that this was why there are so many problems in the slums. I was amazed at how grateful they were - they really seemed to respect what I was saying! (You wouldn't get the same response from an English teenager!)

We are off to complete our final day now.. I will let you know how it goes when we get back and upload the rest of the pictures too!

See you sooon! xxx